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I was wondering if there would come a time when I’d just want to give up fight camp and get on with my life. Well, apparently that time is now.

I’m so unenthused about everything. Part of the problem is that my neck took a good beating in clinching practice on Monday evening, which resulted in a brutal migraine and a very stiff neck. Even today, two days later, I have not regained full mobility in my neck. Since I’m not clinching in my fight, this discomfort just seems…unnecessary.

I’m tired of training for hours everyday. I’m tired of eating salads for lunch. I’m tired of drinking so much water. I’m getting a lot of positive feedback about how fit and lean I’m looking, but it still feels like a waste of time some days. I miss my friends. I miss The Boy. I miss real food. I miss being able to spend my weekends doing whatever I feel like doing. I miss writing.

Hitting a wall is never fun, but I guess it’s somewhat inevitable. I just hope I can climb over it to get to the other side.

What I wouldn’t give to come straight home from work and spend the evening cuddled up with Chloe and The Boy. And maybe a pizza. Yeah, pizza would be good….

When you hit a wall, how do you get over it?

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  1. Anonymous

    Hang in there Holli! Look how far you have come already! Try re-reading fight camp day ten. You have the power! Other than that, I can’t offer much advice, when I hit a wall, I eat pizza (and chocolate bars).

  2. Story Teller

    Thank you, kind Anonymous. I will go back and read Day Ten.

    The Boy and I used to treat ourselves to that kind of thing when we had a tough day, too. Finding other coping mechanisms (and not giving into the urge to splurge) is a challenge, to say the least.

  3. Mystic_Mom

    Holli – when you hit the wall, get back up and go around it, over it, under it or tear it down. Whatever you do don’t stop at the wall, that’ll be the thing you see forever if you do!

  4. Story Teller

    Thanks, MM…the question is, how?

  5. V Y-C

    Remember this is also part of your trainig. If you don’t hit this part, you aren’t going to get the chance to persevere. So I know it sounds weird, but congratulate yourself for working so hard that you have hit this point.

    It’s part of the journey. Your reward will be at the end when you look back. Remember no regrets. This has been your dream/goal for so long. If you quit now, how would you feel when you look back at your life?

    I know I can’t give you personal advice since I have yet to muster up the courage to do what you are doing. I would suggest connecting with other former fight campers or people you are inspired by and ask them what they did when they hit this point in their training.

    I have faith in you Holli, remember, “Every one makes you stronger”

  6. Anonymous

    suck it up! you asked for this! You either want it or you don’t. YOU need to buck up buttercup.

    Kru J

  7. Story Teller

    Thanks for your comments, everyone. I actually felt a lot better after the day’s training session. We did some tough circuit training as a team, and it was a rewarding, challenging experience. It’s odd, but some days the best cure for being tired and sore from working out is…more working out.

    @ Vanessa – Don’t worry, I won’t give up. As much as it’s tempting sometimes, I knew when I signed up for this that there was no way out. I would NEVER let everyone down by quitting mid-camp. There are moments when it’s difficult to keep going, and I feel like I’d be dishonest if I didn’t admit to them. As far as I’m concerned, though, quitting is not an option. Thanks for your friendship and support.

    @ Kru J – Ah, I should have known that my self-pitying whine would coax you out of silence! Thanks for the “tough love”. Sometimes I want it, sometimes I don’t. Most of the time, I’m grateful for the opportunity. Other times, I wonder what I was thinking. 🙂 At least this is a shared insanity.


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